Page 13 - letmetellyou

particularly to being bullied. particularly to being bullied.
result, I attended five different grade schools during my first six result, I attended five different grade schools during my first six
years in school and, at every one of them, I came to know that I years in school and, at every one of them, I came to know that I
was going to be in at least one physical fight during the first week. was going to be in at least one physical fight during the first week.
It wasn’t that I was a puny kid, although I wasn’t particularly large. It wasn’t that I was a puny kid, although I wasn’t particularly large.
The problem was that I was too smart, literally. From a young age, The problem was that I was too smart, literally. From a young age,
twice as hard. This has proven to be an effective deterrent, twice as hard. This has proven to be an effective deterrent,
Despite my initial victory, I was never one to look for a Despite my initial victory, I was never one to look for a
fight. They just seemed to come to me. My parents never owned a fight. They just seemed to come to me. My parents never owned a
home. So when the landlord asked us to leave, we left. As a home. So when the landlord asked us to leave, we left. As a
My Family
I was a prolific reader and developed a vocabulary far beyond my I was a prolific reader and developed a vocabulary far beyond my
years. The other kids called me a walking dictionary and, until I years. The other kids called me a walking dictionary and, until I
established that I would physically defend myself, the bullies established that I would physically defend myself, the bullies
would taunt me. Again, however, it only took one fight to secure would taunt me. Again, however, it only took one fight to secure
their respect. It also helped that I was a very good athlete. In my their respect. It also helped that I was a very good athlete. In my
generation and in my working class, it didn’t pay to be too smart, generation and in my working class, it didn’t pay to be too smart,
which the other boys mistook for sissiness. In fact, it wasn’t until which the other boys mistook for sissiness. In fact, it wasn’t until
one reached high school that the prejudice that intellect and one reached high school that the prejudice that intellect and
masculinity could not co-exist disappeared. In the meantime, it masculinity could not co-exist disappeared. In the meantime, it
helped to excel at sports. Otherwise, some very bright kids had to helped to excel at sports. Otherwise, some very bright kids had to
learn to hide their intellectual prowess from their working class learn to hide their intellectual prowess from their working class
peers to avoid at a minimum, verbal abuse; and I suspect that this peers to avoid at a minimum, verbal abuse; and I suspect that this
same attitude prevails among working class kids, today. same attitude prevails among working class kids, today.
I don’t want to create the impression that my parents I don’t want to create the impression that my parents
fostered violence. On the contrary, we were taught to respect fostered violence. On the contrary, we were taught to respect
others, particularly our elders and those in authority such as others, particularly our elders and those in authority such as
teachers and the police. In fact, so intense was this maxim that on teachers and the police. In fact, so intense was this maxim that on
the one occasion where, as a result of being in the wrong place at the one occasion where, as a result of being in the wrong place at
the wrong time, I was threatened with arrest, I begged the officers the wrong time, I was threatened with arrest, I begged the officers
to keep me if they took me to jail so fearful was I of confronting to keep me if they took me to jail so fearful was I of confronting
my parents after such a lapse in judgment. Fortunately, they let me my parents after such a lapse in judgment. Fortunately, they let me
go home and I survived. I deeply loved and respected my parents go home and I survived. I deeply loved and respected my parents
but, with respect to the temptations that confront all of us during but, with respect to the temptations that confront all of us during
our adolescent years, I survived due solely to a healthy fear of our adolescent years, I survived due solely to a healthy fear of
having to confront my disappointed parents. It was a fear akin to having to confront my disappointed parents. It was a fear akin to
that felt about God by the Jewish people in the Old Testament. It that felt about God by the Jewish people in the Old Testament. It
worked. worked.
What my parents knew was that we would be tested What my parents knew was that we would be tested
throughout our lives, not just by bullies, but by life, itself, and they throughout our lives, not just by bullies, but by life, itself, and they
did their best to prepare us to meet and pass those tests. While did their best to prepare us to meet and pass those tests. While
they were there to support and protect us from abuse or injustice at they were there to support and protect us from abuse or injustice at
the hands of others, they knew that they could not and would not the hands of others, they knew that they could not and would not
always be there and that we had to be able to protect and defend always be there and that we had to be able to protect and defend
ourselves. In the world within which I was born and within which ourselves. In the world within which I was born and within which
5 5
I would succeed or fail, there were many pitfalls. The difference I would succeed or fail, there were many pitfalls. The difference